Growing Up

My mom watched the boys last night when Cole and I went out. She mentioned that Gavin asked her to take his camera out of his room. This was the first we had heard of it and were pretty bummed to hear about it. We have always said that if he wanted it out, we'd take it out. We certainly don't need it there and as he gets older, he needs to know that his room is safe and private. He mentioned it to us today and we said sure we'd take it out, but why? He said he was scared of it. Ok, no problem, it's gone. I'm sad though. I have just loved watching him fall to sleep, play in his room, treat his animals with the utmost of care, and just be the sweet innocent baby of mine. Well, I guess he's not a baby anymore. I just deleted the shortcuts to his camera and felt a big let down. I had opened Justin's room eventhough I can't see him in the dark, I can hear him, and my mouse went right to Gavin's room. I wanted to watch him and Cole in there get Gavin all dry and ready for bed, but it's not hooked up. It's just one of many little things that I will have to let go of while my baby grows up.
I know the quality of the pictures isn't great, but I've included a few snapshots from Gavin's camera from the last 3 years (if you can read them, a lot of the dates on the pictures aren't right).

So thoughtful (said with a smirk)

First, a little background info... Justin is still combat crawling everywhere. He eats just about everything that he finds on the floor.

Today at lunch I was doing some dishes and Gavin has to turn around in his chair to see me.

Sarah, "Gavin, please eat your cookie over your plate."

Gavin, "Why Mama?"

Sarah, "Because, all of the crumbs are falling on the floor."

Gavin, "I'm letting them fall so Justin can eat some too."

Our cool weekend

Now that I feel a bit better, here is what I've really wanted to post...

We had a great time at the party this weekend. We had around 30 people here to celebrate my and Pat's birthdays. As we were getting ready, the power went out. Strange. Then I heard a bunch of sirens and concluded that there was an accident that caused the outage. Thankfully the cake was baked, but I sure needed a shower. We are on a well that needs an electric pump to send the water to our house, so we have a generator for when we really need the water. If the power goes out we can't flush the toilet either. The neighbor has city water and he was out of town, but I had his house key, so I filled a pitcher of water there and planned to take a shower if the power didn't come on in time. It was a nice day so we didn't see any reason to haul out the generator unless the power was still out for the party. It came on an hour later and all went well.

The next day we had my dad, his wife, my grandpa, my brother and his family over. Including the kids, that was 10 people. We had a lovely time and the chili I made was a huge hit. After everyone went home we enjoyed some down time, then we had a very cool thunder storm. We were able to watch it move in and then enjoyed the rainbows afterwards for quite a long time. The sky was amazing! Then, just before we were getting ready to put Gavin to bed, the power went out again! This time was probably from lightening. We set Gavin up with a battery powered lantern and he went to sleep. Cole and I hung out on the back patio with a fire, and of course the power came on. We shut of the indoor lights and stayed out for another hour or so. It was a nice end to 2 crazy days.

The pictures (including the one in the post below this) were taken after the storm had moved through. It was so beautiful, but the pictures barely catch it.

This is insane

I just got up off my knees and I'm hoping for a miracle. I worked last night like normal and had a normal morning after. I got the kids off for their naps and was able to get to bed soon after that. For some reason Gavin was insistent on not sleeping. After an hour he came in and needed to poo, so I had to get up and wipe his bottom. Then Justin woke up and that was the end of any hopes for sleep for me. So, Justin has slept 1.5 hours today, and Gavin is coming out of his room every 5 min. Cole got home and had to immediately ready the yard just in case we get dirt delivered today. I was feeding Justin when Gavin came down again and said "everyone is waking me up." He had been laughing and jumping in his room, so there was no "waking" that could be happening. I was so out of patience that I was almost shaking and almost yelling at him to get back in his room. I was almost swearing and I could feel that I was very close to loosing control. It's amazing what a lack of sleep can do to someone. He went to bed and is now sleeping, but I'm up and have to continue on. I have a couple of other things brewing that are bothering me too that seem so much bigger and more difficult today. I know that they won't seem so bad tomorrow, but I am so tired of this. I set Justin down in his highchair and was walking towards the living room for something when I decided to just drop to my knees right there. I cried out to God to fix this somehow and tried to release it to Him. I think the solution is to not have a job, but that would take a miracle (I do believe in them). I know I'll feel better tomorrow, I'm just grumpy right now.

This blog is usually for sharing fun stuff about us and our lives, but as a journal, you get to read the ugly too. It is a bit therapeutic to share and to know that there are others out there sharing my pain. Thank you for your friendship and prayers.